Honestly, Frankly, Candid

I must say this first... Praise the LORD, we are home with our baby girl, Ufayse!!! He has been so faithful and we are forever grateful. Psalm 34 has been a salve to my soul for the past several months and weeks leading up to our quest to bring Ufy home. Verse 1 "I will bless the LORD at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth. 2 My soul makes is boast in the LORD; let the humble hear and be glad. 3 Oh magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt his name together!..."

We were greeted at the airport by our beautiful family with signs, hugs, kisses, laughter, and tears of joy! We would have hugged anyone at that point after the grueling 20 hours on the plane with our precious toddler. She was frightened and inconsolable at times. God's grace got us through yet again! Then on to see more family (my sweet sister had lunch fixed for us.) And finally home sweet home where we were welcomed with an immaculate house full of groceries, gift cards, flowers, balloons, signs, and might I add a nice bottle of wine for mama. Ufayse immediately began exploring her new home. She seemed happy and ready to settle in to her new home and bond with her new family.

May I be honestly, frankly, candid for a minute:

We knew coming home would be a wonderful blessing and it is; however, it is not the fairy tale ending as some may perceive it to be. We knew this would bring a new phase of challenges as our little Ufay "nee nee" and Kylee and Marcus adjust to the "new Kuykendall home." Greif, fear, feelings of displacement, loneliness, anger, frustration, loss, are just a few of the feelings associated with this change. (as a family feels similarly when a new child is born into the family) Don't get me wrong: there are many sweet moments of loving laughter and snuggles. Progress is happening! We do not feel we have made a mistake! But if you have heard our cries of frustration please don't think, "Oh my, what have they done, or I could have told them this was a bad idea." Life is hard! Jesus said it himself "In this world you will have trouble" But Thank God he didn't stop there: "But Take heart I have overcome the world!" (John 16:33) We have experienced a new dimension of God's grace. So, as we continue this journey we are so thankful for our family and friends who have supported us and continue to encourage us and love us and hold us!!!

This morning I was reflecting on all of our many blessings and as I read Jen Hatmaker's blog on How to help families throughout the adoption process I was inspired to share with you ways to help!

(this is national adoption month by the way)

There are so many families that God has called to adopt or foster.

When families are adopting, while they wait or after placement, here are a few ways to support and encourage them:

1. Please try not to tell them to "be patient and wait" or "Trust more" especially if you've never been there, but rather please pray scripture with them, for them, over them.

Thanks to all of you who have done this! I received so many texts and emails with scripture and prayers that have encouraged us. We have had friends and family stop what they were doing and just pray scripture over us. This reenergized us and gave us hope to continue the arduous journey.

2. Allow them to feel what they are feeling! If they need to laugh, cry, or scream. Allow them to go through the emotions!

I'm thankful for my family-you have allowed me to be me (you make me laugh)! Thank you to my girlfriends for putting up with my neurotic emotional state of being! Thanks for the gno's! Thanks for the brisk walks and talks! And thank you for the hugs and tears you've cried with us! (those of you who received random texts or emails with some not so appropriate language thanks for your graciousness... I did ask the Lord for forgiveness and for desire and strength to walk in the Spirit) Ross, thanks for calling Mark at just the right time and allowing him to express his true feelings! Thanks to all the pastoral staff...You guys are the best!

3. Dinner...provide meals, fill the pantry, give gift cards. We have been so blessed by friends and family allowing us the time to give more cuddles and wipe away more tears rather than scrambling to throw a meal together (including not having to brave the grocery store with 3 kids I can not begin to tell you how much this helps!

4. Please take the other children for a quick get away! Kylee has had more fun and she feels so loved by so many of you who have taken the time to wisk her away, or take her to school (aunt Fa,) or allowed her to come play (Sweet Annie)!

5. Call, text, email, or come over for a short visit. This time can get very lonely! Don't stay for long periods of time, but right after the kids go to bed or during nap come for a short visit with a Starbucks, glass of wine, or chocolate cake.

Thank you for allowing me to be honestly, frankly, candid.

At the heart of it all is the gospel! I've been reminded of the passage in Phillipians 2 where we see Christ's example of humility, counting others more significant than yourselves, he made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross, for the glory of God the Father!

Please Join Us

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

We are asking for prayer for our situation with traveling to Ethiopia to bring our daughter, Ufayse, home. We have felt we are at the final stages for several weeks now.

Friday, September 30th is a major day for us. The US Embassy has been asking for paperwork which we have submitted and the final step (we hope) is an interview with the birthmother. Once this is completed and the US Embassy is satisfied we should receive a travel date. This is very important for several reasons.

1) We have been 9 months without of daughter in our home

2) Our fingerprints expire on October 15th

3) This birthmother has now had to travel to Addis Abba twice which is a major commitment for her

Please pray this with us.

• US Embassy will be able to conduct the interview and be satisfied
• We will receive a travel date before October 15th
• Our fingerprints will not delay us any longer

We thank you in advance for your prayers.

Praying the WAITING is almost over

Monday, September 12, 2011

It is hard to believe that it has been almost a year since we got the blessed news that we had a daughter waiting for us in Ethiopia. In January of 2011 (8 months ago) we got to meet Ufayse for the first time. Then a painful 6 months of WAITING went by and on Friday, July 29 around 11am we received news that Ufayse was official ours. I can still remember Marla calling me on the phone weeping tears of joy. But on Monday, September 12 we still find ourselves WAITING.

We are WAITING now for clearance from the US Embassy to travel to Ethiopia to begin the process to bring Ufayse home. We have hope that the fantastic news that we can travel back to Ethiopia will come soon.

We have a few things that we would like to ask you to pray for:

1) That the Embassy would receive the paperwork they are requesting this week and that we would know our travel date soon.

2) That we can travel and return back home before our fingerprints expire mid-October.

3) God would prepare our and Ufayse's hearts and spirits for this transition.

So we wait and pray and hoping only in God to move the mountains still before us. Thank you for your prayers.

Deo Duce (God is our leader),

Mark, Marla, Kylee, Marcus and Ufayse

Mark is the blogger of the family. I've always wanted to blog, but you see I put on this rather large PP sign that says "I'm a people pleaser. and what would they think if I mispeled a word? or yet even worse what if I make some sort of grammatical error." well, today at this moment I am "taking every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ." Who cares if I meSs UP. I've got at story to tell! so here goes!

As most of you know, we started the process of adoption for the second time in 2008. We were never more excited about a calling than we were at that moment. Having been through the process once before and watching God work miracles, we were pumped and ready for anything! He led us to pursue adoption in Ethiopia, we began the months worth of paperwork, financial fundraising, and the slow and steady education to our family and friends.

We felt completely at peace with the direction God had led us and waited with great anticipation the referral of our sweet little one. As we began the wait I became very ill. Thinking I would have to have some sort of major medical overhaul, due to a very serious diagnosis of endometriosis, we wondered if it would cause any delays in our adoption process. Well, sure enough, it was going to delay us 9 months plus! I was pregnant...after 13 years of infertility, 3 IUIs, 2 failed invitro attempts, God said... "here you go!" What? Ok, fast forward, beautiful healthy baby boy, a hormonal mom recovering from HELP syndrome and an appendectomy, and the rest of the family picking of the pieces. So, baby boy was doing well and I quickly got back on my feet and hit the ground running.

And then it hit me... we have an adoption on hold. So, now what? we had invested so much time, money, and energy, I hated for it to just go to waste. I began praying like a good Christian should. "Lord, do we continue? We know adoption is a beautiful thing. We believe in it, love it, and are so thankful for adoption. However, we now have a beautiful daughter and handsome son and they each have their own room. My husband is a pastor and you know what they make. We must be reasonable when planning for the future, right Lord? Well we want what you want. Okay? Okay!

At this point we had just a few months to make a decision.

Haggai 1:9 "You looked for much, and behold, it came to little, And when you brought it home, I blew it away. Why? declares the LORD of hosts. Because of my house that lies in ruins, while each of you busies himself with his own house." "BAM!" there it was! Marla, "Consider your ways. Consider your ways." What are your priorities? To make sure each child has their own room, all the toys and clothes they could want, and a good education? I have said " 'Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.' And for you that means let me finish what I have started!" So, Mark and I both said, Yes, LORD!

9 months later we had our referral!

I've never seen such eyes as when I saw my baby girl. Eyes that told a story of deep love and loss. I began to long for the day to look into those dark eyes and say, "Daddy and Mommy are here to take you home."

January, 29, 2011, we boarded a plane, resting in our Sovereign Lord! Already exhausted I subsided in my seat, with my sick 17 month old, my 8 year old, my very ill husband, and my dear dear friend to travel the 18 hours for a glimpse into those beautiful eyes!

God truly rocked my world from the moment I stepped off the plane with a deep-rooted love for Ethiopia it's people. I cried as I was hugged, and kissed, and greeted by all of our precious BJoe girls!

On Monday, we arrived at the Gladney Foster Care home, were given detailed instructions, and headed into the room. The sight of naked babies bathing in the sun melted my heart, and they calmed my anxious heart a little. We then walked through the door to a room full of energetic toddlers dancing, singing, and playing. Most of them came bounding up to us to see what type of treasures we had brought them. And then in the crowd of bubbly children I spot those beautiful eyes. Reserved, and yet, curious. As I cautiously approached her, to offer her a sticker, she slowly held out her smooth, beautiful brown, hand. Oh how I wanted to grab her in my arms and hold her close! After three more days of brief but precious visits, a positive court hearing, and many more sights to take in, we boarded a plane to head back home.

We were hopeful to receive a positive opinion fairly quickly along with a return date to bring home our "Joy." That however, was not the case and with many obstacles in our way and after months and months of nothing, we began to plead with our Creator to move the Mountains in our way! We knew that He is Faithful to complete what He has started! We knew He holds the universe in His Hands! We knew his mercies are new each morning! And with all that we knew He began to reveal even more and drew us into His arms as we cried "Abba, Father." On our knees, through dozens of tears, we bowed humbly before our Holy God requesting that she be officially our daughter before rainy season hit and the courts closed. Family and Friends and even strangers were also pleading with God on our behalf as well. And then, it happened, exactly one week before the courts closed, our caseworker called and said it is done! She is yours! "Praise God!" I squealed and then began to weep for "Joy!"

We are still today praising God while we anxiously wait for an embassy date. Our story is not complete yet, but we know and Trust our Redeemer as he places us on the plane to travel the 18 hours, drive to the foster care center, pass the naked babies sun bathing, enter the white room filled with cribs, and look deep into those beautiful dark, eyes and say,"Daddy and Mommy are here to take you home, Ufayse, our "JOY!"

We covet your continued prayers!

Meet Ufayse Ana Kuykendall

UFAYSE ANA KUYKENDALL

We could not be more excited to finally introduce you to our new daughter, Ufayse (O-Fi-Say) Ana Kuykendall. We want to share a little about our new pride and joy.

She was born December 10, 2008, in the southern region of Ethiopia. Her name means JOY and HAPPINESS. We were able to meet her for the first time this past January, and she is already changing so much. We are told she is the "Princess" and everyone caters to her. She loves stickers, bubbles and baby dolls. She is very reserved and cautious towards new faces. We are eager to acclimate her into our family.

NEXT STEPS

We are currently waiting on submission to the US Embassy in Ethiopia. We are told this process will take about 4-8 weeks. We are hoping to travel back to Ethiopia sometime in September.

THANK YOU

We want to thank everyone that has been praying and supporting us during this whole process. We have learned much about ourselves and our sovereign God. We can't wait for her to meet you all.

HOSEA 14:3

In you the orphan finds mercy.

The Best Valentine's Gift

Valentine's Day is a special day for our family. Over 8 years ago we stood in the San Antonio Courthouse and finalized Kylee's adoption into our family. So every year we celebrate "family day." Well this year Kylee surprised us with a gift. Inside a box was a home-made spa treatment (very aromatic we might add) and a letter to us. Neither one of us could get through the letter without shedding tears of joy.

Here is what overjoyed our hearts.

Tonight is a very special night. As you open your present do one thing. Read the story here.

"Once upon a time there was a little girl 2 days old who was out in adoption.

There were two parents that wanted a baby.

They got married at age nineteen and prayed and prayed and prayed and prayed.

They trusted God to give them their wish.

Then finally they got a call saying they had a baby girl.

That's our story. I love you."

Love Kylee

We could not be more blessed as parents. I think our favorite part is that she said this is "our story."

Some Great Memories, People, Places, etc. from Ethiopia

Some of our favorite photos. Sorry but we can not publicly share photos of the children.

Kylee and Marcus in Frankfurt Airport

BeJoe Guest House

Hand-Made Silk Factory

"Marcos" - yeah he's pretty cute

Kylee and her new friend Margo

Aunt Cha - was a God send on this trip

True friends on a journey together - Marla and Cha

Solomon our driver, friend, protector and so much more

Holy Trinity Ethiopian Orthodox Church

Lion Zoo
Quality Family Time

Kylee and her Bubba

Our new friends and BeJoe House mates

Local market

Pure Strength - 12 - 40 gallon barrels

Beautiful Entoto Mountain

BeJoe Girls - oh how they took care of us

Blein and Marla

Genet and Marla

Back from Trip #1

A few days ago we arrived home from our first trip to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. It was an amazing trip as a family but it was also a very difficult one. Spending 36 hours (17 going and 19 coming) on a plane is just hard. But we made it and are now processing our whole experience. I will be honest and say re-entering back into our lives has not been as easy as we thought. There are so many thoughts, sounds, and sights to work through and then to adjust back into our "normal" routines and not to mention getting back on Central Standard Time. There are so many things we want to share about our trip and experience to Ethiopia. Things like:

*Warmth of the people
*Rich history
*Beautiful country
*Our new friends (BeJoe Girls and Soli, our driver)
*Time at the Holy Trinity Church
*Watching our children play
*Seeing people interact with Marcus and Kylee (Marcus would stop production on the house next to us when he would go outside)
*Drive up Entoto Mountain
*Visits to the orphanages especially seeing our little girl and the naked babies sunning

But the one thing that keeps standing out to us is that this would not be possible without the help and support of so many people. We could never say thank you enough for all the people who have and are praying for us, the ones who always stop to ask how things are going and for the many who have helped us financially. This truly is a group effort and we can't wait to be able to share our new little girl with everyone.

So here is the next step. We have passed our court date and our waiting for a group that oversees the women and children of Ethiopia to give us their support. Once we receive that support we will be given a date at the US Embassy to receive her passport and papers. Once we have a date Marla and I will travel back over to begin an intense bonding time before heading back to the states. Please continue to pray for our little girl and this process.

Our Day in Court

Today, Feb. 4th, was a very special day. About 10:30am we gathered
with about 8 other families. They divided us into two groups to sit
before the judge. She simply asked us a few questions and made sure
that we would continue to teach our young daughter about her Ethiopian
heritage. We also heard that all of the birth mothers met earlier that
morning. What a selfless act they made to place their children into homes.

--
Mark Kuykendall

Bitter Sweet

Today was a bitter sweet day for many reasons. One, today was the
last day we will get to see our Ethiopian Princess. It was sweet
because she interacted with Marla by giving us one big smile. Two, we
realized it will be a long road until she is fully interactive with us.
We know she is in great hands and she loves her care giver. Also,
today we had the honor of having a private tour of the Holy Trinity
Orthodox Church with Belay as our guide. To hear of the church
history and the personal impact it has had on Belay (I will have to
blog about that later). We realize the lack of church history in our
lives and were humbled by Belay and the church.

Tomorrow is our big day in court. We will stand with 8 other families
to pledge our love and support for the children we hope to adopt.

Continue to pray for us. There have been many upset stomachs over the
last 24 hours.
--
Mark Kuykendall

Two Worlds Come Together

This week has definately been one of two world's coming together. As
we ventured halfway around the world, we never could've imagine who we
would meet. First, we met the Girtz family (Michael and Shelly). As
we began sharing stories late the first night, we found out that we
only live about 2 hours apart. As the conversations went on we found
out that we both had 8 year old daughters. The girls were all asleep
but could not wait to wake up and meet each other. Margo and Kylee
have been together every minute, and they love sharing this experience
together. Then as we shared pictures, we noticed that daughters were
both in the same pictures. It turns our that our two
Ethiopian princess are crib mates. The Girtz's daughter is age 4 and our's is
2. The care givers say they are great friends. Oh, what a great
experience this has been! We know that the Kuykendalls and the Girtz
will find ways to help these girls grow up together and for our
families to forge a special bond.

Thanks be to God for this connection.

Chow,

Mark, Marla, Kylee and Marcus.

Wednesday Update

Yesaterday was another great day visiting the care center. We missed
the babies laying in the sun naked. When we got there the children
were all out in the yard playing. Tuesday, "Baby Ethi" was much more what
we expected. She was much more reserved and did not offer much
interaction. We are realizing that it will take a lot of time. We
played with all of the children and Ufayse did allow Kylee to hold her
again.

After our meeting we traveled about a hour to the country side
to a lakeside resort. It was like something out of the movies. It
was beuatiful. We were there with over 75 to 100 girls in the
Kichanae orphanage. It was wonderful to have authentic Ethiopian food
and to see all the girls. Later that night, we had a processing meeting
with a social worker and all the couples.

Overall, it was a great day. Charlsie has been a lifesaver. Marcus is doing well and Kylee had her
hair all braided. Our driver Soli (my new best fried) wants to take
Marcus to a stream spa to help his cough. We will probably go their
today. He is really worried about him coughing and wants him to get
better. Today we are going to get some souveniour shopping done and
visit the Lion zoo.

We have one more visit tomorrow and then we have court on Friday.
Everyone is saing the MOWA group should have a resolution soon. We
have meet many other great couples. We miss everyone and can't wait
to share all this with you.

All our love,

Mark, Marla, Kylee & Marcus
--

A Day of Firsts

Today was full of first:

We have had an amazing day full of many emotions. We started off the
day with the visit of a lifetime. We went to the iorphan care homes
to visit the children. As we pulled up we were greeted by 15 precious
babies completely naked basking in the sun. It was one of the most
precious sights we have ever seen.

We then made our way into the room where "baby ethi" was. We prepared
ourselves for not much reaction because she is very reserved. But
were we wrong. After a few minutes she bounded over to Marla twice
and not long after she was allowing Kylee to carry her around. It was
a priceless morning.

We then re-grouped and had lunch with 10 other famlies who were
visiting their babies.

After lunch our afternoon was filed with visiting two incredible
places. The first was a hospital dedicated to leoprasy patients.
Here they train the people and allow them to make a living. We saw
women with nothing more than a few finger numbs knitting and
croqueting.

After the hospital we went to a place where silk farm. We got to
experience the entire process from the silk worm creating cacoons to
the finished silk products. Kylee had to have a scarf.

We then closed up our eveing by hanging our at our guest house. The
children love playing with the drivers. Oh how they are a God-send.

A long but unforgetable day.

Not the start we had planned for!

Today is the day that we start our physical journey to Ethiopia. Our hearts have been the for some time now. But things have not started off as we had hoped or planned for. I have been very sick for the past few days leaving Marla to do all the packing. But the worse part is Marcus. He has been very sick. We had to call our doctor early this morning. What a blessing our doctors have been. Our doctor meet us at the clinic to check Marcus over one more time. Marcus has developed a bronchial infection. We have load up on medicines and are just hoping and praying he can handle to plane ride. If you run across this post please pray for Marcus' health.

But now we are at the airport and waiting to board our plane to Ethiopia.

It is hard to believe this day is finally here.

Soli de Gloria!

What our Ethiopian Adoption IS and ISN'T

I have been thinking about this post for a while and feel that it is time to put these thoughts down.

Over the past 8 years we have had many conversations with others about adoption and orphan care. So this post is simply to publicly say what we feel ADOPTION IS AND ISN'T.

So let's begin with the positive:

IS or DOES:

• A God given passion and a biblical command. (James 1:27)
• Makes us aware of God's love for us. (John 14:18)
• A lengthy process that has taught our family many things about ourselves.
• Brings our prejudices to the surface so they can be confessed. (Colossians 3:11)
• Allows us to be a part of something that is greater than ourselves.
• Teaches us that we are not the center of our own universes.
• Confronts us in that we are not in control. (Isaiah 55:8)
• Allows our children to grow up by experiencing God's creativity in each of us.

Now for what Adoption ISN'T or DOES NOT DO:

• Adoption does not make us special or better than anyone.
• Does not make our adopted children more blessed than others' biological children.
• Isn't an opportunity to be the "Great White Saviors" for children all over the world. Jesus is the Savior.
• Does not make us more caring and loving than other parents, in fact, we could not have adopted without the help of others.
• Adopting from a foreign country is not saying those children are more deserving than children in the US and vise versa.

YOU CAN HELP - "BE MY VALENTINE."

VALENTINE'S DAY is a special day for our family. On February 14, 2003, Marla and I stood in a San Antonio courthouse and pledged our love, devotion, and support for our precious little girl - Kylee. Now 8 years later we are getting close to seeing our third child, "Princess Ethi," in person.

Next Friday, January 28 we will begin our trip (all 4 of us and Aunt Cha) to once again appear in court. Only this time it will be in Ethiopia.

This will be the 1st of two trips we will take to be able to bring "Princess Ethi" home. We are still in need of funds and here is a great way for you to be a part of our journey.

A fellow adoptive family from Oklahoma is selling shirts for Valentine's Day. Every shirt that they sale $10 will go towards a family that is adopting. If you purchase a shirt please tag "Kuykendall" in the order line. This will make great gifts, spread the awareness on the importance of adoption and help us bring "Princess Ethi" home.

If you have any questions, please let us know.

www.africaboundandrews.blogspot.com

Praying, Planning, Packing & Panicking

We are at home tonight and it is hard to believe that we are going to be boarding a plane in less than 3 weeks to start our physical journey to Ethiopia. You can probably imagine all the emotions that are invading us right now.

We are busy creating our list and checking it twice as well as adding to it daily.

Along the way we hope to be able to update everyone about our journey. And we hope to be able to share pictures of our new little girl soon.

Honestly, this is not easy and we have many concerns we are taking before our Sovereign Creator, Sustainer, and Lord.

We covet your prayers! Listed are a few areas of uncertainty that lend themselves to create anxious hearts.

• Will we forget something that we need?
• How will our youngest (16 month old) do on the 18 hour plane ride?
• Will our stomachs and digestive tracks remain friendly?
• How will our new little girl respond to us?
• How will we feel when we get to see our little girl face to face?
• Will we love the coffee as much as we hope we do?
• How will we handle leaving Ethiopia without our new princess?

And these are just to name a few.

On the flip side are hearts are soaring with excitement to see what God is doing and will continue to do! To Him be honor and Glory!!!

It is time to pack a few more things.